One realizes when one is already neck deep in the adoption process that it is scary business. In the beginning, I (Jenn) thought a lot about the good parts of adoption - the parts that gave me "warm fuzzies". Now, after much "adoption education", my response seems to be more along the lines of "oh crap!" You see, my heart has been set on a little boy in Ethiopia for quite some time now. I already love him, I am planning for him, I am asking my children to make sacrifices in order to bring him home, I'm spending a lot of money in different adoption related fees. He,on the other hand, has no idea I'm coming for him. He has likely been traumatized in some way. He has probably been living in poverty. His life is not great - but it is the only life he has ever known. He most likely will not walk into our home and think, "I'm such a fortunate kid. I was living in poverty with no family and now I get to live here!" No. He will be scared. He will be unsure of our love. He will be overwhelmed with new sights, smells, tastes, people. He will very likely act out. He will not immediatly understand that adoption is for his good.

Now people who are adopting are all about adoption. We are an annoying group sometimes. Everything we read, watch, etc. seems related to adoption. So please indulge me once again....I have just finished reading Surprised by Joy (by C.S. Lewis). It is a wonderful book about Lewis' journey to Christ. The following is a quote from that book:

"I did not then see what is now the most shining and obvious thing; the Divine humility which will accept a convert even on such terms. The Prodigal Son at least walked home on his own feet. But who can duly adore that Love which will open the high gates to a prodigal who is brought in kicking, struggling, resentful, and darting his eyes in every direction for a chance of escape? The words compelle intrare, compel them to come in, have been so abused by wicked men that we shudder at them: but, properly understood, they plumb the depth of the Divine mercy. The hardness of God is kinder than the softness of men, and His compulsion is our liberation.".

It's not a perfect analogy. But there are so many similarities between earthly adoption and spiritual adoption. God pursued me relentlessly, for His glory and my good. I did not initially welcome this. But His compulsion was my liberation! Praise God!